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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28625826">The beefy arms fic</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skiewrites/pseuds/Skiewrites'>Skiewrites</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>AU, Bee Movie References, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Gen, Hylian Revali, Revali (Legend of Zelda) Being an Asshole, beefy arms revali, im sorry, to those who read this:</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 10:47:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,678</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28625826</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skiewrites/pseuds/Skiewrites</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that Hylian Revali should be able to fly. His beefy arms are too big to get his twigs for legs off the ground</p><p>Revali, of course, flies anyways.</p><p>Because Revali doesn’t care what Zelda thinks is impossible.</p><p>And it’s a giant ‘fuck you’ to Link.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>28</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The beefy arms fic</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Scarf, chin warmer, ascot, tiny blanket, neck cloth, ooh, scarf. Let’s shake it up a little.” Revali said to himself as he pulled one of his scarfs out of the closet. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was graduating today, which meant that he finally didn’t have to be stuck in that classroom learning about stupid things like the importance of bees to society and other agriculture stuff, which was fine, it just wasn’t something he vibed with. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For as long as the other students spent on the field learning their desired trades, Revali spent twice as long hidden away learning to be the very best with a bow. Sure, archery was something that only the Rito were good at, and the only combat that Hylians seemed to learn was sword fighting, but if Revali was going to find a job where his skills would not only be useful, but appreciated. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And that didn’t even count the fact that he could fly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was still a secret, of course. He hadn’t perfected it yet, but punching the air with his middle fingers up to create an updraft was hard, but he was going to perfect it. He was going to be the only Hylian who could fly, and he was going to fly better than any Rito could.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After perfecting his scarf, Revali left his room, hoping to leave the house without his family seeing him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Obviously, this wasn’t going to be the case. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Here’s the graduate. We’re so proud of you son.” His father called just before he got to the door, causing his mother to come running over to him, pulling at his cheeks and- was she crying?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>How pathetic. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“With a perfect report card too! Oh I bet you just can’t wait to join the family business!” His mother said as tears rolled down her face. Yes, the family business. Dealing with bees. Harvesting honey. It was exactly what he wanted to do for the rest of his life. Waste all the muscle mass he had worked hard to gain in his arms and scrape honey comb for the rest of his meagre existence. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m going to be late.” Revali said as he tore himself from his mother’s arms and left the house. He knew that they meant well, but it was rather unbecoming at times. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was going to be more than a bee farmer. That’s for sure. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>x-x-x</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Welcome, graduating class of, uh, today!" The senior teacher of the small village school looked at them all with a proud smile, one that Revali could only roll his eyes at. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He knew he should have skipped this ceremony-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"That concludes our ceremonies." The teacher said, "And begins your career on the farms!" </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was the ceremony!? At least have a little more pizzazz before shoving people into capitalistic pyramid regimes! </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Will we pick our job today?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I heard it's just orientation.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Revali ignored the mutterings from the other students, Barry and Adam if he remembered correctly. This was utterly ridiculous, but he knew he couldn't leave. No, his parents would ask questions, and if they found out he left, well, he would have to listen to their disappointed tones for the rest of his life, and </span>
  <span>though Ravali lacks basic understanding of emotions, he</span>
  <span> couldn't bare to listen to their whining. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Heads up! Here we go." The teacher yelled before leading the way through the fields, as if none of them hadn't actually been born and raised on these farms. The other students followed excitedly, while Revali stumbled along on his twig legs. Oh, how he wished to walk on his hands right now, or even fly, but that would mean getting his hands dirty, and he had standards at least.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Welcome to Hateno farms, a subsection of Hateno and a part of Hyrule!" The teacher yelled loudly enough to be heard all the way in Rito Village. The other students gasped as if this was news to them. Had they never seen a map before? While he never listened at school, he was certain that they had at least one geography lesson...</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"We know that you, as a Hylian, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life-" The teacher then began to drone on about the importance of farming to Hateno and Hyrule as a whole, and really, what was the point of the school if they were going to be told this at the end of it? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was at this point that Revali's attention began to wonder as he stared at the distant fields, when some Sheikah caught his eye.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It used to be that Sheikah were a rare sight, but with the announcement of the impending war with the Calamity in the near future, more and more of the tribe were spotted as people began to research the robots found deep underneath the soil.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Revali hadn't cared too much about their presence before, except for annoyance when he had to listen to his father complain about them scaring away the bees with their loud noises, but now that he was truly thinking of his future, he realised that they could be his ticket out of here. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Of course, most farmers jobs are small ones. But farmers know that every small job, if done well, means a lot. But, choose carefully, because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"So you're gonna work us to death?" Revali finally piped up, having just enough of his teacher's voice. The teacher looked so excited to be asked a question, as sarcastic as it was. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"We'll sure try!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He needed to leave as soon as possible. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>-x-x-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You decided what you’re interested in?” His father asked as Revali walked into their house, slamming the door behind him. Not even a break to breath, process, or start packing his bags, it seemed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, there’s a lot of choices.” Revali muttered. Running away, for one. Well, maybe not running, since he couldn’t exactly run, but fly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well you only get one!” His father said proudly, a smile glued to his face. Why was everyone so happy about this?! Could they not see themselves?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day?” Revali asked, his anger heating his words. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Son, let me tell you something about harvesting honey. You grab the cone, and you just, scrap the honey off, and you watch it drop into the bucket. You get yourself into a rhythm. It’s a beautiful thing.” His father rambled, only Revali rolled his eyes. Maybe it would mean if it wasn’t something that had been told to him every time his father wanted to speak about work. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yknow, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn’t right for me.” Revali started off small. Revali knew that telling them that he was going to leave and do… something other farming was going to do a lot on their poor weak hearts. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That’s a bad job for a guy with such beefy arms.” His father said, poking at Revali’s thicc muscles, ones he had gained from his own training, and not practicing working on the fields like people thought.. “Honey, your son’s not sure he wants to go into honey!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Revali, youre so funny sometimes.” Mis mother called from the kitchen while his father laughed at his own words, something he did every time that a honey related pun was made.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>“I’m not trying to be funny.” Revali snapped.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>“You’re not funny! You’re going into honey. Our son, the harvester!” His father yelled with excitement, throwing his hands forwards as if he was showing off his future to him there and then.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re gonna be a harvester?” His mother said, poking her head from the kitchen, her face breaking into a huge smile. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No one is listening to me!” Revali snapped, though he wasn’t surprised to see that no one responded to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait until you see the buckets I have.” His father then began to ramble on about said buckets, his mother adding in her two rupees when it came to buckets. </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>“I could say anything right now. I’m the reincarnation of the Hero of Hyrule, wielder of the Sword that Seals the Darkness. Princess Zelda has asked me to marry her.” He got no response from anyone, no, not when buckets were so much more important than his future marriage to the Princess of Hyrule. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh Revali, I’m so proud of you!” His mother cried, wrapping her arms around him. Revali rolled his eyes at the action but hugged back, careful of the enormous strength that his arms held, before releasing her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>”I’m going to bed.” ‘And to pack’ was left unsaid as Revali left to go to his room, sighing as his parents went to talking about his potential future jobs. </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>He had to fly away either tonight or tomorrow morning, before he turned insane. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>x-x-x</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Revali almost managed to get away without anyone knowing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Almost. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>”Where are you going?” Revali held back a growl before spinning around. Anji had been someone who had gone to school with him all his life, and if Revali remembered correctly, which he always did, Anji had accepted a new job as a cucco farmer. That was not to belittle her, quite the opposite in fact, for you were either insane or had a death wish to work with the blights.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m going away.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Away? Away where?” Revali rolled his eyes at her disgusting use, or misuse in this case, of grammar. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Away from here.” Revali said curtly, continuing to walk away from her. He only needed to get beyond the trees before he could fly, and from there, he could travel as far away from Hateno as possible. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had heard that Rito Village was rather chilly this time of year. Chilly, and void of other Hylians. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>”Oh, no!” If Revali continued to roll his eyes at the girls words, they would roll right out of his head. Would she stop overreacting? The true ‘oh no’ would be staying in the village his whole life. </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>“I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life.” Revali explained, his eyes darkening at the thought of working with bees for the rest of his days, without having experienced what Hyrule had to offer him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>”What about the Calamity? You’re going to die! You’re crazy! Hello?!” Anji called after him as Revali walked into the clearing, clearly done with her feeble attempts at stopping him from leaving. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>”If the Calamity is coming, then all the more reason to leave.” Revali muttered as he finally left the tree line. He then punched to the skies, his beefy arms creating an updraft so large that it was able to carry him high into the sky, and far enough from Anji that he could no longer hear her calling him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>-x-x-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If there was one thing that Revali hated about Hyrule, was the weather. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had been flying for a couple of hours now, landing occasionally to rest his huge, muscular arms. He had been making good progress, or well, he assumed so. This was the furthest he had ever been outside of Hateno, and he could only really use landmarks to know where he was going, He had just passed the castle, and the Hebra Mountains were now in view, meaning that he was surely going in the right direction. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had just launched himself high up in the air again, and he was enjoying the fresh air when he realised that something was off. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>”The tension level out here is unbelievable...” Revali muttered to himself as he flapped his hams for arms. It wasn’t until the third drop of water hit the back of his neck that he realised what he said, and realised what it meant. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was raining. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And, for reasons unknown to Revali, he could not fly in the rain. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>”Ah, fuck, mayday! I’m going down!” Revali cried, cringing at his own words. What was the point in yelling that? No one was going to hear him, let alone help him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Falling was faster than flying, thus, the world around him turned into a blur, and instead of flapping his giant arms uselessly in hopes that he would, miraculously, start flying again in the now raging storm, he wrapped them around his head, knowing that he would be fully protected against whatever he crashed into. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After all, this was not his first rodeo.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He prided himself in the fact that he didn’t yell when he crashed into the ground, but he still cursed when he saw that he was still rolling, unable to stop or even slow his momentum. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luckily, he rolled into what he assumed was a tent, or at least a building made of waterproof fabric. He had torn the fabric that was acting as the door off, causing him to get tangled in the sheets, but with the mud and water acting as glue, Revali found it almost impossible to get himself out of it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>If there was one thing that Revali hated more than rain, it was mud. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>”Link, could you close the flap please?” Revali stilled himself at the calm, feminine voice, the tone causing him to clench his jaw. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He heard the sound of someone being confused, before the sound of ruffling fabrics filled the tent. A moment of silence fell, before the woman opened her mouth again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>”Hmm, hopefully this latest theory will work, though, I will need to get Purah’s input on it to see if she thinks it will work… Of course, I could talk to Robbie but he doesn’t tend to think things out before he tries to experiment and well, last time is not something I want to repeat...”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>”Oh great. More people. I don’t need this.” Revali muttered underneath his breath. If there was one thing he hated more than the rain and mud combined, it was other people. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were simply diabolical in his eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even worse than the bees his father kept. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>”Even though my father thinks that I should be spending all of my time in freezing waters to pray to the Goddess Hylia, I truly believe that my time is better spent researching these ancient artefacts, as they simply must hold the answers we’re looking for- Link!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>All of a sudden, the drapes that had been stuck to Revali had been torn away from him, finally! But Revali could not celebrate his freedom just yet, no, not when the person who tore them off him was about to attack him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With a soup ladle. A wooden soup ladle. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As Revali tried to dodge each swipe that the man- boy took at him with said soup ladle (seriously, who looks at a soup ladle and thinks, ah yes, the perfect thing to attack someone with, and why did it hurt so much to be bonked with it?!), he took in his attacker. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Who was wearing nothing but compressed shorts. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>”Link wait! Don’t kill him!” The almost naked boy turned around to the girl, who was wearing a white dress that was barely anything more than the few sheets that Revali still had stuck on him, and dropped the soup ladle to begin moving his hands in an odd fashion. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Oh. He was signing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Revali didn’t know how to sign. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was rather awkward.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>”I understand your concern Link, but he’s clearly not here to kill us.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Silence.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>More hand waving.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>”And I’m just saying that all life has value. You don't know what he’s capable of feeling.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>More silence. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>More frantic arm waving. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was frustrating.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So Revali decided the best thing to do was to leave the tent and enter the rain and step in the mud. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After all, as much as he hated the rain, and despised the mud, he would pick those two things over another human being any day. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>im not as ashamed as i should be</p></blockquote></div></div>
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